Legit Moms and Dads

Upset, one teacher stayed back at school. I asked why? She said she had to talk, more or less pacify, some students of her class who en masse would like to leave their dormitory-like home with the nuns. Knowing the nuns, I knew I was missing something. I dug deeper and asked what's the source of all the "commotion" this time (as though it wasn't the first of many encounters). The teacher said the students expressed that they could not live longer with the nuns. Without skipping a beat I said sarcastically as usual, 'oh, that would be good! At least the nuns would have less mouths to feed and focus on more deserving kids.' Any way, the nuns never forced them to stay with them in the first place.

I know for one, that the nuns would have at least some reason why they would blow their top and put a lid on things in their house. The nuns had reasons... vaguely known?... or not understood enough, ...probably. A large critic of the nuns as I am, deep down I believed these nuns had their greater reasons for the good of these kids in the long run. And this ought to be respected.

The Teacher's eyebrows were twitching by this time. I guessed she really was having a hell of a time figuring out how to reconcile her previous notion of nuns as charitable 'creatures' with her current perception of a stern mother hen who was shooing off the chicks back to their 'places of origin' (in her mind) - their homes.

Thinking out loud to her I said, I would have done the same had I known that these kids have their own parents, single, divorced or in whatever lot they came. The first responsibility to take care of these kids are theirs not ours as 'social-workers'. As many of the cases of these kids have shown, they have a mom or have parents that literally are glad to send their kids to stay and live with the nuns. A free bed space, food and bus-fares are an attractive come-on. And surely enough, an irresistible opportunity not to pass by to lighten the burdens of a crowded home.

Staying with the nuns, for some, it truly helps alleviate the burdens of their home. But on an equal plane the numbers are high of moms or parents who literally take advantage of the kindness of some naive yet well intentioned NGO (religious or not).

The bottom line is, no one replaces a mom or a dad whether she or he be poor or richly endowed. They retain their right as well as the responsibility to be their children's Legitimate Moms and Dads.

The job of NGO's is not to replace families nor replace the role of parents in families. The jobs of NGO's or even of nuns is to build families not separate them. Parents, no matter how shrewed or "opportunistically" talented they may be, they retain their right as well as the responsibility to be their children's Legitimate Moms and Dads. - not the nuns (nor us).

This 'commotion' will give parents a chance to be legit moms & dads again. This commotion will give the kids a real chance to grow into legit moms & dads themselves someday. With this 'commotion' I'm glad that the kids will have an opportunity now to go HOME.